Who would show up at your funeral?

by John C. Maxwell

Have you ever thought about this? When your time comes to leave this earth, how many people will attend your funeral? I’ve heard that on average only 10 people are likely to cry at your funeral, and only ⅓ of the people invited will show up if it rains!

I don’t know about you, but I hope a good number of my friends and family are sad to see me go.

Now, maybe you don’t think it matters. But look at it this way: The people who show up at your funeral may represent the entire impact you’ve had in your lifetime.

I’ve always taught that relationships matter tremendously. But lately I’ve been thinking more about why. Let me share with you some recent research that might make a difference in the way you see your friends and family. I know it did for me. I think you’ll get a kick out of some of what I discovered!

Now, try these ideas on for size.

THE GOOD NEWS

# Having friends helps you find work and be happier, more creative, productive, and competitive in the office.

# People with a wide network of friends have less tension, suffer from less stress, have stronger immunity and live longer.

# Men with healthy parent-child relationships growing up earn an average of $87,000 more per year than men with poor family relationships.

THE BAD NEWS

# Lack of social support is as harmful to heart health as smoking.

# One in 10 people questioned say they do not have a close friend. Plus, 19% of people say they never or rarely feel loved.

# At the end of their lives, people often admit that they wish they hadn’t worked so hard, and instead had stayed more in touch with their friends.

THE INTERESTING NEWS

Every individual can maintain up to 150 significant relationships at one time.Most adults have only two best friends.Scientists have discovered that our brains feel pain when someone we care about feels pain.

How incredible, right? This research confirmed for me what I believe relationships can do for us: they make us better.

Here’s my challenge for you, my friend. Examine your closest relationships. Are they strong and healthy? Do you have good social support? 

If your relationships could use improvement, then I have another suggestion: Ask yourself who you're adding value to. What I mean is, who have you done something for just because you could? The best way to grow and strengthen relationships is to intentionally connect and add value to others. 

I’m talking about giving your time to a co-worker who is less experienced.I’m talking about telling your spouse something you think is wonderful about them.I’m talking about asking your Starbucks barista about their day and really listening.

I’m not just talking about random acts of kindness. Research shows that adding value to others and letting them add back to you can change your life. Plus, it might just get a few more people to your funeral. [wink]