Feel Bad? Then Give!

by John C. Maxwell

"And there is one who withholds more than is right, but it leads to poverty. The generous soul will be made rich, and he who waters will also be watered himself."  (Proverbs 11:24-25)

One of the greatest causes of negative thinking and poor mental health is self-absorption. Selfishness inclines people toward failure because it keeps them in a negative mental rut. That is the reason that Dr. Karl Menninger responded the way he did when someone asked, "What would you advise a person to do, if he felt a nervous breakdown coming on?" Most people expected him to reply, "Consult a psychiatrist," because that was his profession. To their astonishment Menninger replied, "Lock up your house, go across the railway tracks, find someone in need, and do something to help that person."

My friend Kevin Myers says, "Most people are too insecure to give anything away." I believe that's true. Most people who focus all their attention on themselves do so because they feel that they're missing something in their lives, so they're trying to get it back.

Developing a giving spirit, as Menninger implies, helps a person to overcome some of those feelings of deficiency in a positive and healthy way. That's why Menninger says, "Generous people are rarely mentally ill people." A person is less likely to focus on himself if he is trying to help someone else.

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Confrontation results in Purity and Security

“For I indeed, as absent in body but present in spirit, have already judged (as though I was present) him who has so done this deed.”  1 Corinthians 5:3

Paul had to confront the problems the Corinthians faced, especially the issue of incest in the church. Unfortunately, the leaders failed to deal with this sin. Paul therefore instructs leaders in how to deal with a member who rebels against a life of obedience to the Lord.

Why is confrontation so difficult? We often misunderstand its purpose. Our goal among brothers should not be to punish or excommunicate, but to restore. Confrontation is a redemptive act of leadership. So what are the goals of healthy confrontation?

Clarification – I will get a better understanding of the person and what happened.
Change – I hope to get improvement from it. And it may be me!
Relationship – I will likely deepen my relationship with this person.
Purity – As word gets out, the organization will be purified and sobered.
Respect – The organization will likely raise the members’ level of respect for the leadership.
Security – People feel safe knowing leaders are strong enough to take a stand.

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Principle-Centred Leadership

​"My son, give attention to my words; Incline your ear to my sayings. Do not let them depart from your eyes; Keep them in the midst of your heart; For they are life to those who find them, And health to all their flesh. Keep your heart with all diligence, For out of it spring the issues of life. Put away from you a deceitful mouth, And put perverse lips far from you. Let your eyes look straight ahead, And your eyelids look right before you. Ponder the path of your feet, And let all your ways be established. Do not turn to the right or the left; Remove your foot from evil."  

(Proverbs 4:20-27)

Leaders who last do not merely react to their culture; they base their leadership on timeless and universal principles. They remain relevant because they marry cultural context to timeless truth. Proverbs 4 encourages leaders to become principle centered. Verses 20-27 teach us that God's principles give us three crucial tools:

# They are a guide; they help us stay on the right path.

# They are a guard; they keep our hearts and bodies protected.

# They are a gauge; they enable us to evaluate where we are.

Every leader ought to consume God's Word, then put the truths he or she discovers in the form of principles that can guide, guard, and gauge his or her life.

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This excerpt is culled from The Maxwell Leadership Bible.

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